Don Limpio

While doing some housework the other day, I ran into an age-old problem, solved it and caused another.

Here's how the conversation didn't go...

Me: Well, that's the beds made. Let's see if the washing has finished...
Washing Machine: Yes it has. However I'm afraid that washing your whites and reds together was not a very good idea.
Me: Oh nuts.
Washing Machine: Indeed. Good luck wearing that pink shirt to work!
Me: Very helpful. OK let me see... ah here we are. Hello there!
Bleach: Hi! Long time no see. What's up?
Me: I've pinked my white clothes.
Bleach: Uh oh. No problem, let's have a go...
...
Bleach: There you go, all fixed.
Me: Wow, thanks Bleach!
Bleach: Any time.
Me: Erm hang on a sec. This green shirt that I'm wearing now has bleached yellow spots on it.
Bleach: Yeah, and? You wanted your clothes bleached didn't you?
Me: Yeah, but not this one I'm wearing.
Bleach: You should have said so.
Me: I would have thought that was obvious.
Bleach: I would have thought that not mixing reds and whites was obvious.
Me: Touché.

Sevi-yawn?

On a recent trip to Sevilla, I got chatting to a barman who appeared to be familiar with Welsh naming conventions.

Here's how the conversation didn't go (the original was in Spanish, so it's true!)...

Barman: So where are you from then?
Me: North Wales, in the UK.
Barman: Ah nice, my nephew goes to university in Cardiff.
Me: Good choice! That's in the south though.
Barman: I see. So if you're from Wales, your name must be Jones then?
Me: Ha ha, close! It's Williams.
Barman: Ha ha. Do you want another beer?
Me: Of course...

Long Time No See

You: Hey why haven't you published any posts for a long time? I'm sure I speak on behalf of all your loyal readers when I say we really enjoy the posts. In fact, I'd say this has been your most prolific work yet.
Me: Oh gosh, you're making me blush! Anyway, I've been on a month-long sabbatical, taking time out to concentrate on a few things and so on. But don't worry, it's given me a lot of material to post here so you can rest assured that very soon you will once again be reading this high quality material on a more frequent basis.